My World

So you gather 10 people in a meeting room and show them your Powerpoint presentation outlining what’s going to happen with a project that’s happening in the near future. Do you really need to read the majority of the slides verbatim? You think you voicing them word for word is any better than me reading them inside my head?

Your time and effort would be much better spent asking the question “Is the exercise we’re about to embark on really worthwhile, or are there better things we could be doing with our time, that would improve the customer experience more and give us a greater return?”

Corporate life and all its ineffeciences. I love it. Thank you, Scott Adams, for the gift of Dilbert and co - keeping corporate office workers sane around the globe.

(with an acknowledging doff of my hat to Douglas Adams, for stealing 5 words in sequence that make a good title for this blog entry)

It’d be cool if there was some kind of sensory probe thing that you could just stick on the side of your head and it would take the mish mash of partly random, partly not thoughts that are swirling around in your head and convert it in to a work of the finest prose known to man.. or even just a half decent blog entry.. Sadly, it hasn’t been invented (yet?) so you’re stuck with me, trying to get my point across but probably just waffling on with little coherence or structure.

Brian wrote something on his blog the other day about how you’re alone in life. And it struck a chord, not because I’m feeling alone or lonely or anything (although I’ll be the first to admit I get my off days - who doesn’t?), but more because I’ve been thinking about people lately. I’ve moaned before about the people in Vancouver and how it can be hard for people to connect.. and that’s not just me being socially inept or slightly autistic or something - it’s something I’ve heard from a lot of other people. And to be fair, maybe it’s not a Vancouver thing, it’s more of a big city thing. I can’t really compare, having never lived in any other big cities.

Thinking about it, it might not even be a big city thing - it might just be an evolutionary thing.. or a life-stage thing.. The relationships you have with people when you’re younger (teens to early 20’s) can be a lot different from relationships later in life (30’s plus). And I’m not talking specifically about lovey dovey “relationships” - I’m talking more about how you are with your friends, co-workers, the random stranger on the street.

Example: The other week I email a bunch of people I work with about going for beers after work. I’m already going, part of a bigger crowd, and I’m extending the invite. One of the people I invited is someone I don’t know too well, we’ve chatted a bit, that’s about it. Chances are we’d get on - we’re around the same age, work in a similar field, for the same company - already a few steps up from the average stranger you see on the street. But there’s no reply to the email, no face to face conversation in the office, nothing.. not even at 5pm on the dot when he walks right by my desk and out the door, without saying a word. My thoughts? Rude.. fucking rude. In this sometimes cold, harsh, stuck up city, someone just threw you an invite. Maybe you’ve got plans, don’t fancy it, whatever, but you honestly couldn’t spare 2 seconds to say thanks but no thanks and make your excuses?

The semi laid back semi obsessive think to do would be to pull the person on it on Monday.. “Hey buddy - What happened to you on Friday? I didn’t hear back from you and I didn’t see you at the pub either?” But can you be arsed? I couldn’t. Once upon a time I probably would have.. but these days it’s more like “meh, whatever, who gives a shit? so long as I got my booze and had a decent enough time, it’s all good, right?”

Wrong. It’s kinda tragically sad. Sad that I don’t care as much as I once might have. Sad that someone can’t be polite and interact at the most basic level.

I wonder sometimes about relating with others.. how well I do it.. how well others do it.. how much I do that fronty thing instead of just being myself, lowering my guard a bit, etc.. And I wonder how that affects the future.. friends, relationships, that kind of stuff.. I love “real” stuff.. and I just realised the slight anomaly with what I was about to write next. I was going to talk about stuff I see on TV and how I feel about it, then realised that TV is kinda made up, mostly.. yet not.. Example: Tonight I watched Shameless. It’s a drama set on a council estate in the north of England. Definitely not my background or situation, yet I relate well with it because it’s “real” and “normal”. It shows stuff working how I know stuff works - does that make sense?

Maybe it comes down to knowing yourself, who you are, what you stand for etc. But sometimes knowing and feeling are different things.. like when you break up with someone, you know you won’t always feel shitty, it’ll get better etc, but even though you know it, it doesn’t stop it feeling shitty right there and then, does it? Then fast forward to when you feel a whole lot less shitty, but there’s still that knowing/feeling disconnect - the differences between what you know (or think you know?) and how you actually feel? Whoah - hold up - is this the point in this blog entry where I stop making sense and start just waffling on aimlessly? Hmm.. possibly..

I always admire and respect those people who seem to have a very firm handle on who they are, what they do etc. Here I am, 31, single, doing my job, living in this city. What am I doing with my life? What do I want to do with my life? What comes next? Meh, I’m clueless! What is it that makes one person so steadfastedly sure of who they are and what they’re doing, yet leaves others kinda dazed, stunned, confused?

I’m sure I had some point to make earlier.. but it’s getting late now and I need to hit the sack so I can get a decent night’s sleep and be all bright eyed and bushy tailed for work in the morning.. I love my job, but sometimes I could seriously do with not working and just being a man of leisure.. an independantly wealthy man of leisure.. yeah - sign me up! :-)

True to my pledge, I’m updating my blog.. and ok, it’s actually just after midnight on Tuesday and I’ll totally be doing the 23:59 time frig trick so it shows up in the right place.. but at least I’m doing it, right? RIGHT?!

Ruby on Rails: I’m going to play with Ruby on Rails. Simon at work is the biggest fan and gets all doinky in his pants over it. I’m not quite there yet (and doubt I’ll ever will be?) but it IS sexy stuff.. It’s supposed to make developing web apps very easy.. and lets you do all the sexy user interface stuff without having to write tons of complex user interface-y type code. I still don’t totally “get” it, but I want to take some time (make some time?) to explore and play a bit. It ties in with an idea for a website that I have in my head right now, that I think only 3 other people know about.. which brings me to my next peeve..

Domain Name Registrations: What the fuck? Every name under the sun seems to have been registered and most are those corny wank “landing” pages that just have a million links to other directory/advertising pages. I read an article the other day that Bob Parsons (chief bloke at Go Daddy) had written, explaining how registrars can register a domain name, then cancel it 5 days later, then reregister it again.. rinse and repeat.. because they cancel within 5 days, they never get charged by ICANN.. so some unscrupulous registrars take advantage of this and have their own landing/advertising pages which creates extra income for them. Meanwhile, you and I and the rest of the general public can’t get the domain name they want cos some registrar is acting like an asshole. That said, I realised that I already had a domain name that I could use for my project, that’s a .com name that’s only 4 characters long (hello? that’s like gold dust these days, especially if it’s actually pronounceable or recognisable!). It gave me a dippy grin that lasted for blocks! More news on that one as it happens..

Spam is Evil: It’s true. So true. As in spam is just fucking evil and while I may have the tiniest smidge of admiration for people who figure out advanced email address harvesting techniques, really these people are the scum of the earth and should be first against the wall when the revolution comes.. (which is my second Douglas Adams reference tonight, but the first one will be in my second blog post tonight, with me?). I created a new Gmail address the other day. The only place that email address has been published is in The Georgia Straight, and their website (www.straight.com). Within a couple of days of it appearing online, I’ve had spam. What’s happened is the spammers have pointed their little harvesting program/script at the webpage that has a whole bunch of email addresses on it, then sent their spammy shite advertising to all those addresses.. 10 out of 10 for ingenuity, 15 out of 10 for being annoying fucking assholes! And what can you do? Not much really.. click the spam button in the lovely Gmail interface and move on to the next message, sad with the knowledge that you can never reclaim those 5 seconds that you just lost dealing with the message in question.

It’s been noted already, and I’ve commented previously.. I don’t update my blog as much as I used to.. and some of it is that it is effort, but the majority of it is just that there isn’t much to say.. there isn’t a whole lot going on.. it’s work, chill, sleep - rinse and repeat.

However, dear reader.. I make this pledge to you.. going forward I will try and blog daily.. even if it’s just a link to something else that I’ve seen on the net somewhere else.. and sometimes I’ll even write pedestrian boring shit about my day, my life, my world.. other times, I’ll write my classic epic masterpieces (you do remember those, right?).. and if I don’t live true to my pledge, feel free to pull me on it..

The weekend flew by, the day flew by, and tonight’s podcast pretty much flew by too.. a nice manageable length this week, with a rant in the middle that caught me off guard - where did it come from? who knows?!

Link: podcast40.mp3 (31:09, 14.3Mb)

In this week’s show:

• Phil Glanville’s podcast
• Choose The Left podcast
• Overheard In Vancouver
• The audio version of my drunken Saturday night
• The rant about giving money to the homeless
• ..and a few other random tidbits

Ok, so I didn’t blog anything last week.. not like the intention wasn’t there.. I just never quite got round to it.. plus it was a pretty chilled week anyway, not much going on.. so here for your reading pleasure is my mostly regular Weekend Roundup posting!

Friday: In work early cos we were trying to get something finished by lunchtime. Didn’t quite happen. Left work at 4:30 with a bunch of co-workers, hit the pub for one, then off to Tinseltown to see X-Men: The Last Stand (aka X-Men 3). Not bad, 7 out of 10. Cool special effects but a bit of a weak story line. Cool seeing the bits that were filmed in Vancouver. I saw them filming the bit where the winged kid jumps out of the building - it’s right across the road from where I live! Came home, vegged, chilled.. nice.

Saturday: Vegged out some more.. went to Lonsdale Quay for late lunch, came back downtown, met Glen for coffee, hung out for a bit, then came home. Went to Moxies on Broadway with Josh and got drunk. As in tanked. As in wasted. And it was so weird, cos the evening was progressing nicely, getting merry with the martinis, then all of a sudden BAM - I’m wasted! Apparently on the walk back the bus I was babbling about pavement pizzas.. I don’t remember that bit.. I have vague recollections of being on the bus, but the getting on and off are kinda vagueish.. Got home, threw up, went to bed.. at 10:30ish.. poor show eh?

Sunday: Wake up. Look at my watch. 5:18am. I’m happy because I can stay in bed and don’t have to get up and go to work yet. Reflected on my fucked up dreams. Looked at my watch again and realise that it says the day is Sunday.. what the fuck? Sunday?! REALLY?! Now I’m the happiest boy in Vancouver.. but probably one of the most confused too.. cos how is it Sunday, and the weekend, and what happened to the rest of it? Things slowly start coming back to me, and I realise I actually feel a bit hung over!

Went back to sleep, got up around noon, phoned the parents, chilled out.. hung out with Brian for a bit.. spoke to Shawn on MSN.. Jamie came over for a few beers and some venting (and did he ever!). Hit the sack late and woke up tired this morning.. couldn’t be arsed shaving so went to work looking scruffy.. cool day at work, flew by, came home, podcast done, and here I am - catching up with loose ends…

I was all excited today.. I think because I had the day off work and I knew it was going to be a fun podcast.. and it was kinda fun, right up until my PC went PUUUUUKE and spontaneously rebooted! :-(

Luckily, OtsJuke writes to disk as it goes, so with a bit of frigging around with the WAV header, nothing was lost. Check out this week’s “2 parts joined together to make 1″ podcast!

Link: podcast39.mp3 (44:52, 20.5Mb)

In this week’s show:

• Podsafe music from Death Cab For Cutie
• Feedback from Tessa and Dan
• Promo for www.audihertz.net/radio/
• A mention for www.miss604.com
• Wankergirl is now my arch nemesis (apparently!)
• www.pandora.com
• The gay mounties getting married
• www.ominousmoo.com

Stuff I forgot: I meant to say a big thanks to the people who put themselves on my Frappr map. See www.frappr.com/myworldpodcast for details and go add yourself if you’re reading this right now! And I forgot to publicly shame Jared by revealing to the world that he shaved his legs the other day (who DOES that?) (when they’re male and not an olympic swimmer?!)

I’m in Tim Horton’s after work, in my gym gear, grabbing a bagel (wholewheat and honey, toasted, regular cream cheese - it was very nice). There’s this guy in there dropping off a resume cos he’s looking for a job. The crazy woman wanders off.. comes back.. gives him an application form which he sits down to complete.

Whoah! Buddy! Stop right there! You SO don’t want to work at Tim Horton’s for like $8.50 an hour making coffee and bagels! I wrote our careers website address on the back of an old business card and gave it to him.. we’re always looking to hire for the call centre.. might not be his thing, but I’ll take the referral bonus if one’s up for grabs, the money’s definitely better at our place, and it’s generally a good fun place to work at..

Fun, better paid, coolish job versus working at Timmy’s for minimum wage and a healthy dose of hassle? Yeah - I know which one I’d go for!

Maybe something comes of it.. maybe nothing.. but this being Vancouver, it’s all about who you know, not what you know, right? Fair play, I don’t know this guy, he doesn’t know me.. but a bit of good karma never hurt anyone right?

Wow! The weather today was FANTASTIC! Yesterday was hot, today was a scorcher! I was walking to work this morning in just a t-shirt, no jacket, and the digital clock/thermometer thing on the way said 30 degrees.. the one further down said 31.. not sure I believe either of them - the one closest to me said it was 22 at 1am last night.. but it definitely WAS hot out today.. Went out for lunch with Charlotte and sat in front of the Wall Centre.. when we got back, the office air conditioning was definitely noticeable.. and appreciated. Got home and my apartment was roasting, 29 degrees even though the windows were all open.. I shut them, turned the aircon on and we’re now down to a pleasant 23 degrees :-)

Couple of crazy days at work.. the “entertainment” quotient is high - and it’s not even Thursday, what’s up with that?!

This pedestrian blog entry was brought to you by the letters M, and T, and by the number 7.

Woo get me, using big posh words like palindromic! This week sees a bit of banter on a subject that you’ll probably have an opinion on, some blurb on my week in review, and a few other bits and pieces for good measure. The phone lines are back! Check out the last 60 seconds of the show for details - I’d love to hear from you :-)

Link: podcast38.mp3 (34:43, 15.9Mb)

In this week’s show:

• I’ve got a Frappr map! www.frappr.com/myworldpodcast
• Rob’s Feedback
• Bits and pieces from my week
• Security guards in banks - useful? deterrant?
• Homeless people and where change comes from
• The 12 year old pregnant girl?!
• Drama on the SkyTrain and the Night Bus
• More reasons why I hate Microsoft Visual Source Safe
• ..ending with the usual request for feedback + audio feedback phone line details :-)

Stuff I forgot: I was totally going to bust a friend of mine for taking a boy’s first snog cherry/flower/whatever, but I forgot. So you’re safe, that boy’s been kissed now and you were his first - tender! I also forgot to mention the great feedback received via MSN regarding Phil’s text to speech poetry - you have fans, Phil! And tell Dana I WILL sort the money out - RealSoonNow(tm).